I just coded all night.
> Spankins! [Kyouichi Saionji]

Written by Giovanna and Yasha.

    Though it had been only a few months, the girl was absolutely and utterly sure of her relationship. If Saionji hadn't opened up to her, at least he trusted her, and she could tell that it was a rare thing. She felt lucky to be the one he turned to whenever he was upset—not that he ever said as much, of course. This was Saionji Kyouichi. But even though he never said that he needed her, never said that he wanted her around, she knew the words he would never give voice.

    She had to firmly remind herself of that sometimes. Like now. She was standing in his dorm, watching him practice instead of get ready to take her out for dinner. "Kyouichi, you said we could go out tonight—I was looking forward to it so much."

    "I'm busy," he said absently, going through his kata.

    Exasperated, the girl bit her lip. "Please, Kyouichi, you know I'm going to be busy with the drama club for the next two weeks. The play is coming up soon—"

    "And I have a tournament coming up. If you discussed this with me, I don't remember it, and I have no intention of going anywhere. I must practice."

    "You practice on your own—you can do it later. I can't just tell the whole drama club that we have to rearrange our schedules and push back the play because otherwise I won't be able to spend time with my boyfriend." The girl sighed, leaning against his desk and watching the shinai's graceful movements. Her voice turned a tiny bit petulant as she added, "I do have a life apart from you, you know. I can't just drop everything to be with you whenever you want."

    He paused; glancing over his shoulder at her. "I never asked you to drop anything to be with me," he snapped. "If you're so set on going out, go out. I have important things to do."

    "More important than me, I suppose," the girl retorted, her feelings hurt. "If you're so selfish that you—"

    "Selfish? I'm not the one being selfish." Saionji let the shinai fall, turning to face her. "I told you, I don't have the time today. You knew from the beginning that kendo was important to me, and you know I take it seriously. I can't afford to waste time and money—"

    "Oh, so now going out for dinner with me is a waste of time? Saionji Kyouichi, you are the most insufferable creature I have ever met!" The girl stepped forward, glaring at him. "You'd think that by now you'd have the common decency to remember the promises you make, but you're so full of yourself and your kendo that there's no room for anything else!"

    "And I'd thought better of you than a spoiled, selfish little child," he shot back.

    Before she knew what she was doing, she heard the sharp crack of her palm across Saionji's cheek, felt the dull tingle of pain in her hand, and saw him slowly lift his hand to cover his cheek.

    Frozen, she stared at him for a moment, and then abruptly tried to turn away. It didn't work; Saionji's hand shot out, clamping down on her arm, and with a calm that hid the anger she knew he was feeling, he dragged her, fighting and clawing, over to a nearby chair where he sat abruptly down.

    "Hey! You're not—You can't—" The rest of her protest was chopped off as he yanked hard on her arm, unbalancing her so that she was thrown over his lap. Flustered, another ineffectual, "Hey…" was all she was able to get out as he held her down with one hand, the other hand flipping up her skirt and tugging at the waistband of her panties. Collecting herself enough to pound on his leg did no good; with a growl, he caught hold of her arm, twisting it behind her back so that she couldn't move without hurting herself. The panties seemed to frustrate him further; she heard them tear and suddenly felt cool air on her behind. "Let me go, you—"

    The intense sting of his hand against her bared buttocks throttled her attempt to berate him. She let out a yelp, more out of shock than pain. All of a sudden, the pleas began to pour out of her, tumbling over one another in her haste to get them out. "I didn't mean it I was just angry please Kyouichi I—" Smack! The sharp crack of his open palm, harder this time, chopped off her protests again. She bit her lip against the sting, and then tried again. "Kyouichi… please don't do this," she whimpered.

    In answer, his hand smacked into her behind again, much harder than before. The pain was starting to penetrate through her shock; she swallowed back a little cry, tears stinging her eyes as the heavier blows sent jolts through her body. Squirming, she tried to avoid them, which only infuriated him further. The slight sting of his nails as he pulled his hand away was growing worse every time. Humiliation and hurt flushed her face; the tears gathering in her eyes began to roll down her cheeks, and as each bright burst of pain flooded through her, another few fell to the floor.

    The harsh strikes began to taper off, and, almost without volition, she started to struggle again. This only brought a renewed hail of blows—Saionji was so totally caught up in his anger that he didn't notice the tiny sobs she tried to muffle. On and on it went, until she was too exhausted and aching to fight any more. The fiery pain in her backside flared anew every time his hard, calloused hand struck it, but she couldn't struggle anymore. She simply lay, limp, unable to do more than let the tears drip down her face even though he was again easing the force behind his strikes.

    The hail became a stream of steady blows, the stream became a trickle, until finally it dried up completely. For a moment the girl wondered whether he would begin again, but before she could even clear her throat to make some sort of plea, Saionji let go of her arm and abruptly stood up, dumping her off his lap and onto the floor.

    Her elbow slammed into the ground, and she bit back a yelp of pain, but fortunately she'd taken the fall on her hip. The fall would have bruised her buttocks further—and what would Saionji have done if she'd cried out?

    Staring at the floor, tears still trickling down her cheeks, she didn't dare move, not even enough to take off the torn panties that were still tangled around her knees or flip down the short skirt of her uniform. Saionji made no sound; she could see his legs out of the corner of her eye, and he wasn't even moving. After a long, long while, she fearfully raised her head, looking up at him.

    He stared down at her with an expression of utter disdain, his lip curled in disgust and his eyes flicking over her rumpled clothes. As his gaze moved back to catch hers, she almost cringed.

    Without warning, all of his disgust vanished. He stepped back, looking almost afraid of what he'd done, and an expression of shame suddenly passed over his face.

    The girl quickly looked away, realizing that she was now free to cover herself. Flipping the skirt down, she hissed as the cloth came into contact with the red and tender flesh of her buttocks. Looking up at him through lowered lids, she saw that he was simply standing there, staring at her as if the sight of her like that had caught him in some awful trance. She glanced away again, closing her eyes.

    A strangely hesitant note was in Saionji's voice as he said, "Here. Get up." She looked up, seeing his offered hand, and then her gaze flicked fearfully toward his eyes. Seeing no sign of the rage of before, she carefully placed her hand in his and allowed him to help her up. She winced as her muscles flexed and held onto his shoulder as she stepped out of the ragged shreds of her underwear. "I was just angry," he said gruffly, putting a supportive hand on the small of her back.

    Looking up at his face, she wiped a tear away before speaking. Her voice sounded shaky and childish to her own ears. "I didn't mean it…" The sense of shock that had sustained her was beginning to crumble away into panic.

    He quickly looked away. "I…" All of a sudden he shook his head, and then looked back at her, his eyes almost painfully earnest. "You should lie down. You've… got some scratches—I'll get some antiseptic…" He looked down at her trembling knees, and then stooped to carefully pick her up.

    Once he'd laid her on her side on his bed, he went to his washroom to get the antiseptic, leaving her a few moments to calm herself. Breathing deeply, she wiped her cheeks again, forcing back the panicky feeling with some success. This had been unexpected, to say the least. As he walked back toward her, a bottle in one hand and some cotton balls in the other, she looked him over more carefully.

    He was almost as upset as she was—but even though he was upset, he seemed strangely flustered, the way he'd seemed the first time he'd seen her naked. "Here," he said, laying the antiseptic and cotton balls within her reach.

    Flushing a little, she looked away. "I can't do it myself," she murmured, embarrassed. "I can't see the scratches."

    "Oh." He looked her over again, and then glanced back at her face. Uncertain, he began, "Do you want me to—"

    She just looked at him, feeling tears welling up in her eyes again.

    "All right," he said quickly, looking away. He carefully turned her, lifting the skirt gently away from her bruised buttocks. The first sharp sting of the antiseptic made her gasp; he stopped as quickly as he had when she'd slapped him. "Sorry."

    "It's all right," she said. "It just surprised me." After that, she tried as hard as she could not to make any noise while he worked on her, in spite of the stinging pain and underneath that, the dull throb of her bruises.

    Once he was finished, he carefully pulled her skirt down again, standing up straight and turning slightly away from her. She could tell that he didn't want to be reminded of what he'd done. "If you want to be alone," he started, but she could hear the unwillingness in his voice.

    "No," she said quietly, turning on her side again. "I don't think I want to be alone right now."

    "But I—" His words chopped off, as if he couldn't bring himself to say what he wanted to say. "I shouldn't have done that," he said, so softly she could barely hear it.

    She couldn't find an answer to that. Instead, she pretended that she hadn't heard it. "Kyouichi… come sit down."

    He quickly looked at her, surprise dissolving into acceptance, and then carefully seated himself on the edge of the bed. After a few moments of silence, neither of them looking at each other, he asked quietly, "Does it hurt much?"

    His voice sounded so ashamed that she looked up at him. He still wasn't looking at her; instead, he stared at the floor. A sudden surge of guilt for her actions hit her, and her hand crept into his. "No," she said, more an apology than a denial. He glanced toward her, startlement dawning in his eyes. "I shouldn't have snapped at you," she murmured, looking down at the bedspread. His hand moved lightly over hers, his thumb stroking her palm. Very carefully, she drew their linked hands to her face, resting his knuckles against her cheek. "Kyouichi," she said, barely above a whisper.

    "What?" he asked, his voice almost as soft as hers.

    Loosening her hand from his, she pressed her cheek into his palm. "I'm sorry."

    Who doesn't think of Saionji when they hear 'spanking' and 'Revolutionary Girl Utena,'? He's the series' physical abuse mascot, so it's no surprise he's also suspect number one when it comes to spanking. What's ironic is of the whole cast Saionji is the least likely to engage in spanking as a sex act, while the rest would be at a total loss to see it any other way. Still, Saionji has circumstances of his own that would allow for such behavior.

    Those circumstances aren't, in and of themselves, terribly hard to come by. It didn't take a specific situation or girl to set him off. All it took was a girl that was important to him, and such a girl would be very present in the life of a Saionji not already enamored of Anthy. Despite himself, he's not a natural loner, and if his heart wasn't otherwise taken, the odds that he would have a steady girlfriend are high. This girl is a nice complement to Saionji's personality; she's got bite but not too much of it, and she's dedicated to an art, something which Saionji can relate to in principle if not in the specific choice of interest. Most importantly, she's patient; it took a great deal to set her off. This would take priority over everything else for Saionji's ideal girl, simply because it takes patience to break through his barriers, and even more patience to deal with his total lack of social graces in relationships and everywhere else.

    It would be overshooting to say he's prudish, but Saionji's conservative traditionalist attitude keeps him from developing a kinky sexual nature. If you brought up kink outright he would laugh and berate you for being silly. Humor is not by any means what he'd be feeling, but his rude response would be with the intention of keeping you from bringing it up again in the future. To him kink is unnecessary. He gets off fine without, so why waste time on it? This isn't to say Saionji would be a lazy lover. It's just anything more than Saionji Kyouichi and whoever he's having sex with is too much. To him, honey is just a food, and lingerie is silly frippery. Saionji has a penis, he has a mouth, he has hands. What the hell else do you need?

    Saionji does take this belief to heart, but it's also a poorly veiled cop-out. Each character sports a psychological issue that makes their life hell, and Saionji's is his absolutely dismal self-esteem. It's the root of his abusive nature, his stand-offish compulsion to make people hate him, his controlling personality, and in this case, his sex habits. If a girl says she wants to try something kinky, he'll interpret it as her saying: 'You're not enough for me.' He wouldn't see it as adventurousness or curiosity; he'd just see it as you wanting something other than him. This attitude finds Saionji lacking in regards to kink; he doesn't understand that it isn't meant to replace him. It doesn't help that Saionji would be turned off by a woman who wanted to be hurt. His understanding of human nature is too keen to take such a desire in stride, and a tolerance for abuse might hit a bit close to home for him.

    Spanking doesn't have any sexual connotation to Saionji; he regards it as disciplinary. Spanking is kinky? That's news to him; spanking is what you do to an insolent child that needs to be put in their place. He probably remembers quite a few sore asses of his own to this end. Though Saionji would not see the sexual significance of spanking, he would understand full well the reasoning behind the act as punishment. The helpless position and the embarrassing body part used make spanking humiliating, and the pain is hardly any fun for a child. Knowing that as he does, it's not a huge leap of logic for him to decide to spank someone he saw as sorely needing it.

    This in mind, you have to ask: How many people can Saionji possibly spank in one day? Thankfully, the connection to spanking isn't made every time he encounters someone with too much lip and attitude for his tastes. What would push him over the edge is disappointment. Insolence and immaturity are to be expected from Utena, so it's a moot point to punish her. However someone who has managed a place in Saionji's private life would have much to lose by behaving childishly. His respect. While his natural inclination would be sudden random acts of violence, as with Anthy, in the case of our unnamed girl, the punishment fits the crime. His girlfriend is acting like a child? Then she'll be treated as one. In the end, it's the same control-through-violence issue rearing its ugly head.

    In this scenario, his girlfriend witnesses a side of him that he never does show Anthy, despite multiple assaults and the personal guilt of committing them. Saionji expresses shame and regret for what he's done, and he expresses it to her. It wouldn't be jumping to conclusions to suspect Saionji spent many a night alone angered at himself for his treatment of Anthy. What makes this situation special, that he expresses his disgust with himself where there's an audience?

    A while back I said Saionji wouldn't see the sex in spanking, but that's not entirely true. Spanking as defined in his head is not innately sexual. It wasn't sexual when he decided to spank her, and it wasn't sexual while he did it. It's only after the fact, when he's exhausted his fury and can see clearly what he's done, that it hits him. There's a beaten, sobbing girl on the floor. Her panties are torn and out of place, her skirt is lifted up. Though his intentions were sexually innocent, this is in no way an innocent image to behold. He can see quite clearly what this looks like—it looks like he raped her. That's the image that will stay with Saionji. If this event is ever brought up to him, he'll remember that he sexually assaulted a woman for no apparent reason. For him, it doesn't matter what he meant by it—he knows what it looked like. He would regret physical abuse (as he did with Anthy), but the added sexual association further fuels his guilt for what he's done. It's that, the realization that what he just did was sexual in nature, that leads him to express shame and apologize.

    Saionji has, to say the least, a strong sense of moral decency. People rarely see this because his abuse toward Anthy makes it seem unlikely, but keep in mind that Saionji regrets his treatment of her. This is never said out loud, of course, it's more in body language and tone of voice, something impressed on you by his character without being spoken. Off the top of my head the only time I can point out his regret is in episode 2, where he meets Anthy at night. Right before he slaps her, he slumps his shoulders as though he's been defeated, forced into a corner, and is being made to do something he doesn't want to do. Talking to her didn't work, and so he must fall back on his less appealing option—abuse. He doesn't like his behavior, and when it's referred to directly (such as by the Seitokai in episode 1), he ignores it and pretends he doesn't do it. Alcoholics are rarely proud of their addiction, so they don't easily admit they have a problem. This is the case with Saionji—he's not proud of what he does, so he doesn't talk about it, and since no one ever forces him to account for his behavior, it's swept under the rug. (The Seitokai make a noble effort, but seem to drop it once he loses the Rose Bride, thus avoiding the ultimatum entirely.)

    Saionji's self-esteem is so poor that he feels in a sick way justified in his being abusive. He uses it as proof he's the terrible animal he believes himself to be. He's a piece of shit, so go figure that he can't control himself enough to keep from hitting a defenseless woman. It fuels his self-loathing, and he certainly takes no joy or pride from the act. However, sex is beyond the line to which Saionji can accept his instinctual aggression. His conservative stance makes control over baser instincts play largely into his moral code. Saionji would experience pangs of guilt and self-hatred accepting sex. Taking it? Absolutely not, he would kill himself if he ever did such a thing. That he didn't mean what he did sexually is the only reason he's not shoving his practice sword into his eye sockets.

    Furthermore, this situation demanded a response from him. Saionji could smack Anthy with impunity; she would touch her face and continue watering the roses. This was no accident on Anthy's part. It caused him more anguish that she all but ignored his abuse than it would have if she'd cried, got angry, or feared him. However, she had to recover quickly from his assaults, or he would have reached an event horizon, so to speak, where he'd lose the ability to bury his guilt under anger. Here he's injured someone beyond fast recovery, so he's stuck in a position where he has to own up to his behavior. And because he's really not an evil guy at heart, he does.

Essays
Personality + Relationship + Narrative + Miscellany + Music

Context
Introduction + Characters + Reference + Submission

Go Home
Analysis of Utena + Empty Movement

Akio is no rapist, he is just an opportunist that makes his home a school full of emotionally compromised teenagers. This frame is actually pulled from the Metropolitan Museum of Art archives.
I considered making this a time gif that would occasionally flash Dios as having a ponytail. Then I got lazy.
I know this layout is sort of a spoiler, but so was the closing of the first season, so suck it.
This is far and away the most complex layout I have coded, and I know it does not look like it.
So are they waltzing or foxtrotting or what?
Because according to Ikuhara, if it were Akio, they would be doing the lambada.
These swords ended up looking like the crosses in Evangelion. I left it on purpose because hellz yeah.
I wanted this layout to look like a fairy tale. It ended up looking like a French textile exhibit. Oops.
Polly want some C4? Sorry, coding and Colbert do not mix.
It is March. It is snowing. It is Canada.
You know what is an awesome idea? Coding on your rag. That is smart.